Conversation with a veteran, a marriage veteran.
Met a 98 year old woman today who was married for 60 years.
MARRIAGE RATE: 6.5 per 1,000 population
DIVORCE RATE: 2.9 per 1,000 population
Me: “Wow, that is unheard of these days. What age did you get married?”
Her: ” I was just out of high school, so 18.”
“So if your husband passed away in 2010, then you were married for 60 years!! That is incredible but maybe not so unusual for your generation.”
“Not really, back then when you got married, that was it. You had no other choice so you only thought of making it work or working with it”..chuckle.
“Now it’s one thing to be married for a long time, but were you happily married?”
“Now that’s the thing about marriage. You are not always going to be happily married. You make it work.”
“That’s very different from today. Today, it’s “I deserve better”, “Oh my, I made a bad choice”….too much second guessing, too many escape options”
Disclaimer: I divorced and remarried. I am happily married. However what I know now, may have saved my first marriage and avoided much inconvenience for my children. I was married the first time for 15 years and now happily married to a beautiful and diligent wife, herself a divorcee. We were engaged for over 7 years before we officially tied the knot. Talk about caution!
The legacy of marriage
First the cold reality of a happy marriage:
All of this is based upon studying marriages that lasted and the couples are happy.
A successful marriage fosters and yields a great legacy normally, the effect of which is felt by generations to come. In the same manner broken marriage may inflict damages that have a cascading effect on subsequent generations.